Step 11: SOUGHT THROUGH PRAYER AND MEDITATION TO IMPROVE OUR CONSCIOUS CONTACT WITH GOD AS WE UNDERSTOOD HIM, PRAYING ONLY FOR THE KNOWLEDGE OF HIS WILL FOR US AND THE POWER TO CARRY THAT OUT.
Since November 21, 2017 I have witnessed miracles that are tied to my recovery and that or others. For me it is the rebuilding of relationships with some family members, building friendships with people I never knew before recovery and having the strength to remarry. Each may seem insignificant but considering where my mind was in my addiction and what happened when everything came out, it’s a miracle I am alive.
Recovery, for me, is accomplished because of the relationships built with others. Yesterday that became even more clear as a dear friend who was one of many mentors died. When I received the call it was a gut punch. It was as if I had lost a close family member and although she was in her 70’s it was a shock. I still think of her friendly smile that greeted me at that first meeting. I only hope I can live up to her example.
As I mentioned above, my concern for others has grown and being open minded is a part of that. I am not by any means perfect in this area but it has definitely improved from the days of thinking about gambling while being around family and friends.
My faith has also grown. Although I studied to be a minister when I was young, I now realize that my life is my ‘ministry’. My care for others comes from a genuine realization of my own faults.
It’s never too late to learn new things. I have become the “old dog” but only because of a physical age and the time since my recovery began. It has taught me that learning new ‘tricks’ is part of growing older. I need to adapt to new ways my addiction tries to call me and how to fight the call.
When I was gambling (in my addiction) I always looked for a new way to get more and all it brought was pain. Now I give of myself and find I have more than I had when I was looking to get something.
I have received complements for what I am doing in recovery quite often. It is not something I deserve all the credit for because the network of others who are also in recovery are a source of strength. Although I accept it for what it is, a part of the process of being an example.
My recovery has given me new values and a better grasp on truth as well as honesty. It pays off daily in my strengthening resolve to be clean in this moment.
Over my process of recovery I have begun to get more and more peace of mind and satisfaction from helping others. I’ve achieved more freedom from letting go of it and taking things “one Day At A Time”” It took hold for me after my first meeting as a result of the slip I had within moments as a result there is a growing desire to help others understand the addiction and how it takes hold of a person.
What are your thoughts?